Identifying Your Blind Spots
“When you can truly understand how others experience your behaviour, without defending or judging, you then have the ability to produce a breakthrough in your leadership and team. Everything starts with your self-awareness. ”
What’s a ‘Blind Spot’?
Our communication behaviours are split into four different types.
The two most influential being Open Areas and Blind Spots.
Blind spot behaviour is just as influential, if not more, than the behaviours we are aware of.
Blind Spots: The Basics
All of us will have blind spots – it’s is a normal state
Our blind spots will contribute to our ability to speak up and/or to communicate with others
Exploring our blind spots is an act of courage
Sometimes our Blind Spots can trick us. For example, we think we are taking a stand but actually we are taking an ‘I’m right’ attitude
Our blind spots can block us from achieving and/or getting what we want
Feedback is vital to addressing blind spots
10 Common Blind Spots
Blind Spot: Going it Alone
Examples
Not consulting others
Not asking for help
Not accepting help when offered
Not including others in decisions
Feeling like ‘only you’ can complete the task
Potential Consequences
You become overworked
Your decision making ability is limited to what you know
Others experience you as ‘on edge’ without understanding or compassion
Others resist or ignore decisions you make
Others stop sharing information with you
Blind Spot: Not recognising your impact on others
Potential Consequences
Your valid concerns are ignored in favour of the perception of your behaviour
Others may avoid or placate you
Others may agree with you, even if they believe you are wrong
In the long term, others may never change the behaviour you are hoping to address
Examples
Making comments or taking action that are perceived as a lot more negative than intended
Judging others on their behaviour (how rude) but expecting to be judged on intention (I was just trying to sort out a problem)
Being unaware when others are intimidated, insulted or concerned by our actions
Blind Spot: Having an ‘I know or I’m right’ attitude
Examples
Having an answer for everything
Not listening to others
Always having a reason why the ideas of others won’t work
Ignoring evidence that may challenge your views
Refusing to explore options or alternatives
Potential Consequences
Others may dismiss your opinions based on their perception of your lack of objectivity
Others may avoid or placate you
Others may agree with you, even if they believe you are wrong
Others may not share ideas with you for fear of being shot down
Blind Spot: Blaming others or circumstances
Examples
Avoiding personal responsibility
Externalising the problem to another person or area (that’s X ward’s mistake)
Preferring to change others rather than ourselves – If they had done X properly this would never have happened
Responding to every question/piece of feedback with ‘Yes But’
Potential Consequences
Others may cease to trust you based on their perception of a lack of personal accountability
Others may perceive you as incompetent even when you have excellent knowledge/skills
Others may avoid or placate you
Others may hide concerns or mistakes based on fear
Blind Spot: Treating commitments casually
Examples
Not keeping commitments
Not meeting deadlines
Always maintaining an escape hatch
Saying ‘I’ll try’ rather than ‘I will’
Potential Consequences
You may experience shame or a sense of failure
Others may cease to trust you based on their perception of you as unreliable
Others may perceive you as incompetent even when you have excellent knowledge/skills
Others may ignore your abilities when considering career pathways
Blind Spot: Conspiring against others
Examples
Being part of cliques
Talking about concerns with others without raising the concerns directly with the person
Talking about ‘they’ – they’ll never agree, if they want X they better do Y etc.
Being passive aggressive – rolling eyes, not showing up for meetings etc.
Potential Consequences
Your concerns aren’t heard
Others may see you as ‘nasty’ rather than constructive
Others may wonder what you say about them when they are not there
Others may perceive you as incompetent even when you have excellent knowledge/skills
Blind Spot: Avoiding difficult conversations
Potential Consequences
Saying things are fine when they’re not
Working around a difficult person rather than trying to address behaviour
Trying to say something so ‘tactfully’ that the message gets lost
Potential Consequences
Behaviour you find difficult will continue to occur
You may find yourself periodically ‘exploding’ and then feeling sorry
You will waste a lot of time avoiding the conversation
If you don’t talk it out you’ll act it out
Blind Spot: Not Taking a Stand
Examples
Having a belief that an action is right but not going forward through fear of what might happen
Refusal to make a decision for fear of consequences
Asking others to work around a problem rather than addressing it
Potential Consequences
You may experience increased stress as you try to balance your thoughts and your actions
Others may perceive you weak or neglectful
Others may perceive you as incompetent even when you have excellent knowledge/skills
Blind Spot: Withholding emotional commitment
Examples
Agreeing to a decision or action intellectually but not emotionally
Just complying with decision
Resisting in passive ways
Going through the motions
Potential Consequences
You may experience increased stress as you try to balance your thoughts and your actions
Others may perceive you as incompetent even when you have excellent knowledge/skills
Others may see the difference between what you say and what you do and cease to trust you
Blind Spot: Accepting Good enough
Examples
Deciding that near enough is Ok
Not willing to be part of change
Potential Consequences
Others may perceive you as incompetent even when you have excellent knowledge/skills
You may lose interest in your work and experience increased stress
Source: Vital Smarts